East Meets West

“Andy” was the manager at a restaurant and he scheduled my interview for 5pm on a Friday night. I came a little early, and rather than asking me any questions, Andy said, “Bus the tables and pour water if the glasses are half empty.” About three hours later, I answered the phone (after a mere hour on the job, I was taking orders, delivering food and fetching esoteric ingrediants from two basements) only to hear “Mary! You’re not dead!” I’d forgotten that my boyfriend thought I was at a job interview. I didn’t come home around one in the morning. Andy and I were the only wait staff. I worked four hours three days a week and then 14 hours a day Friday and Saturday (10 AM – 12 AM); followed by Sunday breakfast from 7AM – 7PM. Andy worked like a madman and he had various sayings to buck me up. When I asked him what to do, he’d say:

Think and act!

Work hard, make money!

Use your common sense!

None of these were relevant to running a restaurant. I had to guess, but we were serving Indian food and most people had no idea if they’d received the right dish or not. Towards the end of every shift, Andy would treat me to water glasses of Popov vodka, while I tended to last few customers, swept, mopped and calculated my tips. Then one day we moved eight tables out of the basement. Instead of stairs, the basement had a platform halfway between the upper and lower levels. Andy stood on the platform and I shoved the tables up to him, then climbed into the restaurant and pulled them up while he pushed. The whole time, he yelled, “The arm! The leg! Use the arm and the leg!”

We argued constantly. I’d burst into the kitchen, “Table four wants garlic naan! Where is it?”

Andy would reply, “I served that naan!”

“To the wrong person!” I’d exclaim.

Then we’d realize that we had to work and resume arguing at the next pause. The cooks and dishwashers found this hilarious. Andy told a table of eight that I’d miscommunicated their request that their food contain no garlic, onions or spice. In an Indian restaurant. He called me over to scold me and I said, “That’s a lie! I quit!”

“No you don’t!” Andy really said this.

“Watch me!” I walked out.

Comments (18)

zomboidMay 21st, 2010 at 7:36 am

that sounds kind of fun

KMay 21st, 2010 at 10:22 am

nice! stick it to the man… this writing sounded kind of all over the place.I’m guessing stuff was omitted due to space?

AndrewMay 21st, 2010 at 12:28 pm

Yeah, there wasn’t much flow. But it was a fun story to read nonetheless.

Amy KMay 21st, 2010 at 12:44 pm

I think I know what restaurant this is. And I’ve worked for this owner in his new restaurant. Completely non-structured and poorly trained management. Oh Andy.

ValenciaMay 21st, 2010 at 7:50 pm

I like the writting, fast paced, exciting, all stream conciousness and what not.

MMMichelleMay 22nd, 2010 at 10:56 am

God I love quitting bad jobs. You know your not going to get a reference, so why not torch that fuckin’ bridge! Haha, well done.

BikeLizardMay 22nd, 2010 at 1:45 pm

mary here. i wrote it that way because to describe everything that was wrong with that job would’ve taken a freakin’ new yorker essay, though I could’ve been clearer.

AmyKMay- Michigan? Or does he have an evil twin?

TMSMay 22nd, 2010 at 2:12 pm

While I’ve never yelled at the boss and stormed out, I’ve had two jobs I hated so much I just stopped going. One of them I never bothered to get the last check for, I made so little it wouldn’t have mattered, and the second job eventually mailed me my last paycheck.

AndrewMay 22nd, 2010 at 3:40 pm

Same. I usually try to give a notice but I don’t always, depending on the circumstances surrounding my departure.

yourlocaliwantutobesmartergrouchMay 23rd, 2010 at 5:18 am

ok i stopped paying attn because the writing was so bad. after u show up for the interview the logical progression of time goes out the window. did your bf come to the restaurant in person? after u didnt come home? or 3 hours after your interview? and then u go to what your weekly schedule is like. *so confused* please dont submit if you cant take the time to have it make sense.

adminMay 23rd, 2010 at 7:51 am

As the story states, the boyfriend called the restaurant and Mary answered the phone, so he was not there in person:

About three hours later, I answered the phone (after a mere hour on the job, I was taking orders, delivering food and fetching esoteric ingrediants from two basements) only to hear “Mary! You’re not dead!”

GeoffMay 23rd, 2010 at 9:54 am

I agree, the writing was terrible and made this story hard to read. Also, I’m not sure if this really qualifies as a very worst job, compared to the far more obnoxious bosses and jobs on this site. The writing isn’t bad because it’s lazy, it’s just bad writing with no logical flow and the dialogue was useless. Why not just write out in simple english what were the bad aspects of the job? Hopefully you’re still in highschool or something.

JeannieMay 23rd, 2010 at 9:17 pm

The beginning sounds like my job. I applied to a retirement home as a waitress and my current boss called me, asking if I wanted the job. I said yes, and he made me take a drug test and do a background check. After that was done, he scheduled a time for me to come in. I thought I was going in for an actual interview. Nope! He had me fill out all the paperwork to work there and I began an eight hour training session right after that.

I wasn’t too happy about that either!

MMMichelleMay 24th, 2010 at 9:55 am

Maybe the writing could have been better. But. For people to say they can’t read it because of the bad writing? I hear this on this site a lot. None of the people that submit story’s are professional writers. If you guys can’t read it, it sounds like a personal problem. I am severely dyslexic, and I can read every story on this site fine. If my blind ass can figure it out, I bet you can too!

MeshellMay 24th, 2010 at 11:12 am

MMMichelle, the ironic thing is that the majority of the Illiterates on this site have the writing ability of a 12 year old just learning to text.

canadiancowgirlMay 24th, 2010 at 4:20 pm

Man, the people who like to look down on other people’s writting ability are pathet-a-sad.

Also, I’ve been in that situation before. You think your going in for an interview and they just throw you at the job. I don’t get how people can run a business that way!

TronnerMay 25th, 2010 at 8:57 am

ya i agree wit those that say op cant write her style sucks lol man is it hard to understand her use of punctuaction and paragraphs and capital ledders this thing reads like an english lesson and i bet she thinks shes super smart using the return key and the shift key and lolroflmao man i love bashing on ppl scuze me while i throw this stone dontcha think my glass house looks pretty?

Honestly, I thought the story was pretty good. Not sure what the big problems were.

NickJune 3rd, 2010 at 7:57 am

It’s not so much grammatical and spelling issues that plague the writing: it’s the tone. There’s little to no indication that Mary* had a problem with Andy* until “We argued constantly” and then suddenly “I quit!”. In fact, we are previously led to believe that their relationship is solid, with Andy* trying to “buck me up” and “treated me”, and even the arguing was implied to be playful thanks to the disclaimer that everyone found the arguing “hilarious”.

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