Pizza Prick
A few years ago, when I was 20, I got a job working at a popular pizza chain answering the phone, placing orders and occasionally helping make pizzas. I got the job for extra money to help with college. The manager, “Chris,” seemed like a nice, cool guy. He was kinda cute and a little flirty, but I was a very naive 20 year-old, and didn’t think much of it. On my first day of work, a few of the fellow employees, Chris and I decided to head to a bar after work. At the bar, he was really fun and started flirting with me, but since he had a girlfriend, I just figured that he was just a flirty guy. A few weeks went by at work, I got into the routine of the job and became fairly good friends with everyone. I even got a job for one of my best friends. Chris and I would joke around at work, as would everyone else.
It all started falling into the drama category when one night, while everyone was at a bar for a fellow co-workers birthday, Chris started flirting with me and asked me on a date (oh, how I was so naive not to realize it was sexual harassment). I laughed it off, since he was drunk, and told him that I’m sure he is very happy with his girlfriend and he was just being silly. The next day, I pulled up into the parking lot and another car came squeeling to a stop at the spot next to me. I was a little taken aback and as I was grabbing my purse and hat, a woman knocked on my window. I realized it was Chris’s girlfriend, so I rolled it down. She looked like she’d been crying and proceeded to ask me if I was seeing him. I promised her I wasn’t and she asked if he had asked me out or had been hitting on me. I told her, honestly, that he had, but it was only when he had been drinking (how stupid was I?). She calmed down and thanked me for being honest with her.
I went into work and was a bit distraught. I went straight to Chris and told him I had to talk to him. I told him what happened and he just looked at me and said, “And?” I couldn’t believe that he saw there was nothing wrong with the situation. I told him that he needed to let his girlfriend know that he wants to be with her and maybe spend more time with her. He was just blase about it and said she needed to get over it. I emphasized that this made me uncomfortable and he needed to stop flirting with me. He seemed to get upset about this and then decided he was going home. One co-worker saw that I was upset and said, “Hey, I have a story that will make you laugh!” I am quoting this directly (it’s engraved in my mind, since I was shocked from how horrible it was): “My uncle worked at a school for ‘special people’ (he used a different word) and he took a girl into the janitor’s closet and had sex with her. She came out of the closet with her pants around her ankles, crying that her butt hurt.” He then began laughing like it was funny. I just stared at him in horror, excused myself and went outside to cry.
A few weeks went by without incident and I had begun to date a guy in one of my classes. One day he showed up while I was working and brought me a necklace that reminded him of me. I thought it was sweet, as did my best friend. But Chris told me that he didn’t approve of friends visiting employees while at work. Mind you, everyone had friends visiting and since we were attached to a gas station, everyone had people they knew coming in. Chris even said that the necklace looked cheap. I, stupidly, ignored him. About a week later, I got a phone call from work, while enjoying the day with my best friend. Chris said they were short on people and needed me to answer the phones. I told him I only had my shirt with me and had plans later. He said he only needed me to work for an hour and I could use his office to answer phones since I wasn’t dressed for work. My best friend decided to come with me and wait.
So, I went to work. When I got into his office he showed me how his phone worked and then went to make pizzas. Later he returned and suddenly closed the door, so it was just us in his office. He just stared at me and then this wonderful conversation happened:
Him: “So you have plans tonight?”
Me: “Um, yeah”
Him: “With that guy that came by a few weeks ago?”
Me: “No, me and my best friend are having a girls night out.”
Him: “I really don’t appreciate this.”
Me: “Wha-?”
Him: “You need to open your mind before you open your legs!!”
I sat there stunned for a second, then anger took over. I started screaming at him that he had no right to say that to me and that I quit. I took of the work shirt (I had a tank top underneath thankfully) and threw it at him. I stormed out of his office, told my friend that I needed to get the hell out of there. And that was the end of MVWJ. I actually saw Chris just a month ago at a local restaurant. He was there with some of the old fellow employees and they wanted me to come say hi. So, I went by and someone asked me if I was seeing anyone. I told them that I didn’t have time for a relationship. That’s when Chris said, “Oh, looks like she’s still a cold-hearted bitch.” I didn’t even know what to say except “Go f*** yourself” and left.
I found out last week, that he had gotten fired because he is addicted to meth.
Wow, that is HORRIBLE. But good for you for realizing that this is Entirely him being a d-bag, NOT anything to do with you.
what a sleaze bag. really, the first thing i will tell my child when she gets her first job is watch out for sexual harassment! some companies do show sexaul harassment videos, wonder why not every does.
Good thing his girlfriend didn’t think that you two had something going on. This coworker of mine’s ex girlfriend would press her face against the store window at STARE at us with this deranged smile, when nothing was going on. Creepy.
AHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!! This was like elebenty different kinds of awful! Good for you for gettin out of there
Asking you out on a date is not sexual harassment, especially when you said that you were flirting back with him. Whether or not he is with someone else, also doesn’t make it sexual harassment. In fact, pretty much everything that you put into parenthesis was stupid.
But anyway, toward the end of the story it actually gets good, wish you had left off the first 3 paragraphs
@Tanek- Actually, I would consider him asking her on a date to be a form of sexual harassment. As her manager, he is in a position of authority with her (legal term: a position of trust), and entering a relationship is a breach/misuse of that authority, as a person in a submissive role cannot really consent. I know in the UK it is illegal for a person who holds a position of trust over another to have sex with them; even if it is consensual. Laws are different in every jurisdiction, but there are also organizational rules that prevent this, as well as, oh well, maybe personal and professional ethics. This is why professors can’t date students, why youth group leaders can’t date their youth, why doctors can’t date patients, and why supervisors can’t date their employees, even when age-wise it may be legal. So yeah, OP, you’re NOT stupid and that WAS sexual harassment.
I’m the OP and to Tanek, I did NOT flirt back with him. I don’t think you read my story correctly. He flirted with me but I ignored it. And it is sexual harassment- just as Andy stated. I should have gone to upper management and filed a complaint, but I was really dumb and naive at the time. A boss should not try to make advances towards their employees. In fact, that particular company states that managment cannot date employees.
I’m surprised you didn’t slap the shit out of him over the “Open your mind before you open your legs” comment, and then the “cold hearted bitch” comment when you saw him later. I know several of my female friends that would have, and then some.
I agree with exgf that you got off lucky with his ex, if his reaction was “she needs to get over it” when she just confronted you, I’d hate to see what his reaction would have been if his ex had attacked you. As for the necklace your boyfriend gave you, he probably came down on you about him visiting you and the necklace looking cheap is because you shot him down because he already had a girlfriend (who he apparently didn’t give a damn about).
But, I do like it when karma comes back to bite the Chris’s of the world in the ass.
i was also really naive about that kind of stuff, but also when I was younger, sexual harassment laws were a lot more slack. This guy went over the line from day one. I would have smashed his face in when he said that open your legs remark. What a sleazo! Glad he got his due though!
Agree with Andy. This person asking her out was a no win situation for her….she could either say yes even though she didn’t want to, for fear of losing her job, and go on a date with a guy she knew had a girlfriend already – or say no, and potentially face firing or other reprisals. That’s why it’s defined as “harrassment,” because there’s nothing innocent or simple about it.
Love the end bit…
Well, you’re the OP so I guess what you say is what happened but it does say in the story “Chris and I would joke around at work, as would everyone else.” From a responible person’s point of view that could be taken as flirting.
Also, thank you for the legal lesson Andy, as I’m sure you’re law degree in England is serving you well, but you may want to review. A major flaw of your immediate reasoning is that you are making the assumption that a date = sex. There is also a HUGE different between what is the “law” and what is “company policy”. There is no law that an employee cannot date an employer, but there may be strict company policy against it. And furthermore it is actually NOT illegal for a teacher to date a student as long as the student is of an age of consent (typically 18).
So once again, not only was it clearly no illegal for him to ask her on a date, but it was also no where near the definition of sexual harassment.
As I originally said, it seems like a really bad job, just that it was poorly written.
The legal definition of sexual harassment is “unwelcome verbal, visual, or physical conduct of a sexual nature that is severe or pervasive and affects working conditions or creates a hostile work environment.
“Although a single unwanted request for a date or one sexually suggestive comment might offend you and/or be inappropriate, it may not be sexual harassment. However, a number of relatively minor separate incidents may add up to sexual harassment if the incidents affect your work environment.”
Counter arguments?
I can’t believe in this day and age people still think rape is funny. WTF is wrong with people?
What rape?
I can’t believe in this day and age that people think asking someone out on a date is rape. Maybe that’s why you’re single?
@ Tanek I believe Ick’s comments were directed at the “funny story” the OP was told by her co-worker (barf)
And while the initial request for a date may not have been harassment, her employer’s continued attempts to involve himself in her dating life can ceetainly be construed as sexual harassment, particularly since she had already indicated that his advances were unwelcome. “Unwelcome advances” are textbook harassment
Tranek, I’m not sure what your deal is, but joking around doesn’t necessarily pertain to flirting. Most people at work JOKE AROUND to make work more fun. Yeah, I didn’t flirt with him, everyone would joke around about either the customers or one another. Tell silly stories, etc. You really seem to have some hostility towards flirting, so maybe you’ve been turned down recently. Regardless, it’s no reason to claim I was flirting with him. My best friend could vouch for that. She was there, you weren’t.
Even if he had taken my sillyness as flirting, he had no right to sayor do what he did. Just because a woman will talk or joke with a man, does not mean she is welcoming any advances. That’s what a lot of men don’t realize.
@Tranek, you never said it was poorly written, you just bitched about her “joking around” with everyone. So what if she joked around with her boss. He made unwanted advances towards her and put her in extremely uncomfortable situations. That IS sexual harrassment. If a boss keeps asking out an employee and he/she declines, they have every right to report that boss.
OP, that boss was a complete prick. Sorry you had to go through that and then have some douche like Tranek tell you you’re stupid. Don’t listen to him.
What kind of idiot would think joking around is automatically flirting?
And, Tanek, what kind of idiot would hear “You need to open your mind before you open your legs!!” and NOT understand that this is sexual harassment?
OP, incidentally, your co-worker who told you about his uncle raping the girl? Also created a hostile work environment. Keep that in mind. I’m sorry for what you went through, and hope you don’t berate yourself for not reporting it earlier. It’s not like it’s an easy situation to diagnose. Look at Tanek, for the stupidity he’s displayed thus far.
Looks like Tanek is one of those guys who automatically thinks a girl being nice and laughing at his jokes is flirting with him.
Im very sorry that you went through that type of treatment. Im 41 year old pizza driver that has been in the pizza business for 22 years and I worked for dominos pizza (franchise) and family owned pizza shops. I had no problems with the family owned shops and its the best places I have ever work at. I have had a bad boss too. The dominos pizza owner was a complete asshxxx. He was power hungry and he did illegal stuff and he kiss ass towards dominos pizza. The owner was dating the manager and she was a bitxx too. We were having problems with bounce and stolen checks. If the check bounce the owner would take it out of the mangers payroll check and she takes it out of the driver’s check. We had to put the order number on the customer’s check so the owner or the manager could look it up on the computer and I heard that someone caught both of them snorting cocaine in the parking lot. No one should go through that type of crap. Work should be fun. If I was you I would have kick him in the privates and talk to his boss or the owner of the pizza shop. I try to treat everyone how I want to be treated.Theres alot of better bosses and guys out there. Chris (your old boss) is the biggest pig and slime on the planet. I hope you have a much better boss now.
wow. honestly I think the worst part is that your coworker thought telling you a story about how his uncle raped a handicapped girl would be funny
Simply asking someone on a date, even if one is in a position of power when doing it, is not sexual harassment. Women who believe that bullshit are ruining the work place.
Here’s how it works:
Hot boss asks out subordinate — Kick ass!
Weird boss asks out subordinate: –Sexual harassment!